Hola hola! As alluded to in my last blog post, Beth Roach Photography and I recently got together for another body confidence photoshoot. Our last one took place in summer 2017 and, if you’ve been following me for that long, you’ll know all about the struggle I had with putting on weight… then feeling like I’d gone too far. Beth helped ‘2017 Lilly’ get to a better, more confident place. But something that’s emerging more and more as I look through our 2019 shoot photos is that you can’t fake being content with the way you look and feel.
It’s no secret that the last year has been huge for me: I ran my first marathon, I moved to the (albeit small) city of Oxford and I started a new job. Especially in the last six months, I’ve exercised more (running my fastest ever half marathon in December and finally reaching my long-term goal of a sub-30 5k), eaten healthier (and recently decided to try going vegetarian – I plan on blogging about that separately!) and above all else, I’ve just been so genuinely happy with how my life is working out. In 2017, I was struggling with difficult feelings about myself. In 2019, I feel like I have finally found my real self.
Left: 2017, Right: 2019. Both photos by Beth Roach Photography
So at the beginning of my shoot with Beth, I donned a vest and some underwear and felt ready to go with no qualms. And she said herself how much happier I seemed in myself.
I know I’ve lost weight – and like before, people who haven’t seen me in a while tell me I’m looking trim. I don’t get that moment of glee anymore though. I’m not working towards a target, I’m not telling people I’m happy with how I look while secretly crying at myself in front of the mirror. I’m just happy. I’m confident. Even with my various lumps and bumps, I don’t feel like they need to go away anymore. I can’t tell you how good that feels.
I realise that being confident is not a black-and-white thing – there are always going to be the odd days where I wish I could change something about the way I look. I think the difference is that those days are few and far between now. And you only have to take a flick through some of the photos from my shoot with Beth to see that’s the case…
All photos in this blog post were taken and edited by Beth Roach Photography.